Andrew Garfield Is A Dick

Andrew Garfield


Apparently starring in cinematic masterpieces such Amazing Spider-Man and Amazing Spider-Man 2, make you think you're an untouchable Hollywood star who would only condescend to honor a 5-year old with cancer at the Academy Awards only if you get to write your lines, and if you're told you can't, you throw a hissy fit and walk out. Because, I mean, fuck that Batkid guy. It's all about you, Andrew Garfield. Star of a movie where a make believe guy in a gay bodysuit fights CGI things. Page Six reports:

Not even a 5-year-old boy with cancer could persuade egotistical actor Andrew Garfield to be a presenter at the Academy Awards. The “Spider-Man” star was supposed to take the stage Sunday with Miles Scott, who has come to be known as “Batkid” after the city of San Francisco let him play superhero there. The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences had arranged with the Make-A-Wish Foundation to further make Miles’ dreams come true. “The academy was going to make him an official superhero during the Oscar ceremony. Andrew Garfield was going to appoint him ‘Batkid.’ But, in the middle of the dress rehearsal, Garfield decided he didn’t like his lines,” said a well-placed source. “Garfield refused to go by the script. He came up with his own lines. The producers felt that Garfield’s [rewrites] were not appropriate. Garfield had a tantrum. He stormed off. Miles and his family, who were at the rehearsal, were devastated.” The producers decided to cut the superhero initiation, but they paid for Miles to go to Disneyland. “Garfield was such a spoiled brat that he didn’t even want to be a presenter,” said my source. The academy had to call “Captain America” star Chris Evans to sub at the last minute.

I hadn't really planned on Amazing Spider-Man 2 anyway, but I guess this makes it pretty much official. I mean, look at this freaking kid. If they asked me to dress up in a unicorn onsie and tell Ashley Greene my penis was small in an infomercial I'd do it if it meant this kid had a great day. A day he can't take for granted like most of us. I wonder if Andrew Garfield's spidey sense can tell when I'm about to punch him in throat. Let's find out.