Blake Griffin Didn’t Beat Up Justin Bieber. Sorry.

Blake Griffin Justin Bieber Rumor


As much as we'd all like to believe it, Clippers' forward Blake Griffin didn't beat up Justin Bieber in a Starbucks. Sorry, guys. I know how much that meant to you. The story was first reported here (which should have been your first clue). They use WordPress like me, so I'm not sure what kind of news you were expecting. The problem with fake stories is that they get way too specific (“He came in with no shirt on and his pants hanging down and underwear showing and tried to order a caramel apple machiatto.”,) and include quotes that sound completely made up (“He smacked the shit out of him” said one witness, “then I saw Justin stumble out of the door looking like he was crying.” ) If Blake Griffin really did smack the shit out of Justin Bieber, Bieber wouldn't be stumbling. Bieber would be in ambulance suffering a massive head trauma and shitting himself. So yeah, this story is fake. Much like democracy. Aliens are real though. Aliens are all around you! WAKE UP SHEEPLE!


Since we're talking about Blake Griffin, here's my favorite Nike commercial of the past year. Not only is this commercial basically accurate of what Griffin does every game, but Bieber would so be Daryl. Also, I have those kicks.