Simon Cowell Is Paying $3M A Year In Child Support For 21 Years

Simon Cowell


The stories about vaginas opening like the Red Sea when a wealthy man passes by is nothing really new, but Simon Cowell is now on the hook for $3M a year because of that one time he didn't pull out of his best friend's wife. I really hope I never lose my job, because I don't have a vagina and a healthy uterus to fall back on. Hollywood Scoop reports:

The former "American Idol," now "X Factor" judge/ringmaster has a net worth of $330 million, a large portion of which will be diverted into child support payments: $97 million. It was revealed last week that the music mogul had an affair with the estranged wife, Lauren Silverman, of his close friend Andrew Silverman, and that she’s also pregnant. It’s a messy situation, so after seeking legal and financial advice on how to smooth it all out, Simon’s pledged to give $3 million a year to Lauren until the child turns 21, the Daily Star reported.

I don't think there's any vagina on Earth worth $3M, but I guess diapers and formula costs have been ravaged by inflation I don't want to sit here and point out the obvious loophole in the gender equality debate, but if all men were required to have vasectomy's at 18, there would be a lot more women in the workplace.