The NYPD Didn’t Slap Amanda Bynes’ Vagina

Amanda Bynes Wig


I was going to recap the Amanda Bynes weekend crazy today, but Fish already recapped the shit out of it (so read it here), but remember when she said NYPD officers sexually assaulted her and "slapped her vagina"? Yeah, apparently we're you're insane you think invisible hands are touching your genitalia. E! Online reports:

But on Tuesday, after conducting their own investigation, the NYPD fired back against the actress's allegations and denied any wrongdoing.  

"NYPD Internal Affairs investigators have found no evidence to corroborate Ms. Bynes' allegations," Deputy Commissioner Paul J. Browne told E! News in a statement. "To the contrary, a credible civilian witness who was with the officers throughout told investigators that none touched Ms. Bynes inappropriately or otherwise engaged in misconduct at any time."

So at what point now do Ben Kingsley and Mark Ruffalo get involved? It has to be soon right? It has to be.