Adele Is A Miraculous Healer Now Apparently

If I can be honest, I was hoping this was a food coma so I could have a built in joke. Us Magazine reports:

The Grammy winning singer’s trademark song “Rolling in the Deep” played a surprising role in the life and survival of Charlotte Neve, a 7-year-old British girl who had been languishing in a coma for months. Although doctors told Charlotte’s family that the little girl would not survive, she unexpectedly woke up — and smiled! — when the chart-topping track played on the radio. After suffering a brain hemorrhage in mid-April and undergoing two operations, Charlotte had slipped into a coma, one her doctors didn’t expect her to recover from. Her mother, Leila, tells British paper The Telegraph that she was getting ready to say goodbye to her comatose child when the song, one of Charlotte’s faves, came on. “Charlotte started smiling, and I couldn’t believe it,” Leila recalled. “It was the first time she had reacted to anything since the hemorrhage. The nurses were astounded and told me to keep singing, and she smiled again. The nurses said it was like I ‘unlocked her’ and from that day she started getting better and better.” A couple days later, Charlotte “literally went from smiling and being giddy to standing up in bed,” Leila continued. “It was a miracle.” She is now recovering at home, learning to walk again, and is even back at school.

Totally. Adele so saved this girl’s life. Or her mother did. Or the doctors. Or that thing where, I don’t know, people suddenly wake up from comas. I heard Adele was so moved by this story that she visited the girl and put hot sauce on her then ate her. Oh, please. You know she thought about it. You know, only after the girl wasn’t a vegetable. HAHAHAHA, BOOM! SAVE & PUBLISH!!