Rest Easy, People Of Miami

“You see that plane? It doesn’t have any terrorists on it I can tell you that much.”

I bet hurricanes and Miami police officers feel pretty stupid right now with nothing do since Mark Wahlberg is there filming Michael Bay’s Pain and Gain. Hurricanes can just go back to Africa and the police can just go grab some donuts or whatever, because nothing goes down on Mark Wahlberg’s watch. Mostly nothing goes down after the fact in his delusional fantasy where he’s the hero. Criminals better not forget the legendary tale of the 5’5″ wigger douche who cleaned the streets of Boston by throwing rocks at black children on a field trip and beating middle-aged Vietnamese men with sticks until they were permanently blind. To be honest, I’m actually scared right now.

Pic source = Fame/Flynet