Justin Bieber Knows He Looks Like A Girl, Thinks About Michael Jackson Everyday

Crave Onstage: Low Volts

Because the entire world is on pins and needles wanting to know the inner thoughts and views on life from an 18-year old Canadian who sometimes wears silver pants, Complex sat down with Justin Bieber and oh jesus what the fuck ever.

Something about Selena Gomez:

“There’s no way to hide the relationship completely, because then it would be unfair to us,” he says. “It’s like, ‘You take this car, and I’ll take this car, and then we’ll meet up at the spot. Then, you go in this door, I’ll go in this door. We’ll end up crossing ways. You get back in this car. We’ll cross over, do a James Bond. You go through the kitchen. I’ll go through the back area. Then we’ll meet in the dressing room and see each other.’ At that point, it’s not even a relationship. You’re just hiding from everyone. That’s unfair and unhealthy, man.”

Something about being an unappreciative, thankless jackass:

“I’ll be covering my face,” he says, “and it pisses me off so much when people say, ‘Get over it, Justin. You’re famous. People are going to take your picture. Suck it up, you’re rich…’ It’s like, ‘Yo, I just got off an eight-hour flight. I’m tired and my eyes have bags under them. I’m not trying to take pictures. I’m not going to come to your house, wake you up, and start snapping your picture.’”

Something about you being a hater if you say he looks like a lesbian:

When asked about a recent V magazine shoot in which critics thought he looked feminine, Bieber is coolly dismissive. “Every guy has feminine qualities,” he says. “You’re raised by your mother and father, and I was raised mostly by my mother. I think the pictures turned out good—so whatever.”

Something about how he’ll probably buy a kiddie rape ranch when he’s in his 30s:

“There’s no point in doing this if I’m not going to be the best,” Bieber says. It’s this attitude that suggests Bieber will have a longer run than other tween pop stars. “When I release something I want it to be the best,” he continues. “When I release my fragrance, I want it to be the number-one fragrance; I don’t want it to be the ninth-best-selling fragrance. My Christmas album went double-platinum worldwide. Christmas albums don’t do that, and that still wasn’t good enough for me.” Bieber wants to win so much he’s only looking to the record books for comp. “He’s competitive with Michael Jackson,” Braun relates. “When he looks at who he should chase and who’s setting the bar, we only talk about Michael Jackson. We talk about Michael probably every other day.”

Fascinating. I’m just a little upset why they didn’t ask him if he thought that banner picture was an accurate representation of what he will look like in 20 years after the police find him on Sunset because he couldn’t jack off but stole the Arab guy’s $40 anyway.