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Hipsters the world over are ripping their flannel H&M in the streets right now because co-founder, chairman, and former CEO of Apple Inc., Steve Jobs, died yesterday at the age of 56 after a long battle with pancreatic cancer. What’s the big deal? Can’t we just restore him from a backup? In a statement announcing Jobs’ death, Apple’s Board of Directors wrote:

We are deeply saddened to announce that Steve Jobs passed away today. Steve’s brilliance, passion, and energy were the source of countless innovations that enrich and improve all of our lives. The world is immeasurably better because of Steve. His greatest love was for his wife, Laurene, and his family. Our hearts go out to them and to all who were touched by his extraordinary gifts.

Bill Gates was unable to comment as he was in the morgue trying to steal the code for cancer. He promises that it will be able to use Adobe Flash.