This Isn’t Fair
Snooki’s boyfriend wants to get married. And breed. The New York Post reports:
Snooki’s equally pint-sized boyfriend, Jionni LaValle, told us he’s looking forward to a marriage with the “Jersey Shore” star. “She’s a good girl,” he told us at the YRB magazine cover party for the “Jersey Shore” girls at District 36, where the two celebrated their 10-month anniversary of dating. When asked if marriage was in the future, he said, “Hopefully.” If the two decide to have babies, LaValle said he wouldn’t allow them on a reality TV show but added, “She probably would.”
Man, fuck this. Aside from infecting the gene pool and basic cable, do you have any idea how much an advantage their kids are going to have in the zombie apocalypse? They’re going to be too small to catch and so braindead that no one’s gonna chase them anyway. I guess Special Olympians have an edge too.