The Gays Have A New Enemy

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Last night, country singer and judge on NBC’s American Idol In Swivel ChairsThe Voice, Blake Shelton, tweeted these reworked lyrics to Shania Twain’s hit Any Man of Mine. Withing hours, the Gay Police put on satin hotpants and a cutoff police shirt tied in the front then took out a bedazzled baton to do what they normally do: Make 14 characters fit into their agenda then demand an apology. GLAAD says in an open letter.

“This is one of the judges on what’s so far been one of the most gay-friendly reality shows on television. For him to make a joke to his 300-thousand-plus followers about leaving a gay man ‘beaten, bleeding and heaving’ is completely unacceptable.” “Blake Shelton needs to recognize that violence against the LGBT community is not a laughing matter, and he needs to apologize to his fans, and to fans of The Voice, for his comments,” GLAAD’s post continues.

Okay, before you read Blake’s response and the actual reason for the tweet, please tell me where in that banner pic is a homophobic sociopath ready to murder a homosexual. Please. Because, if a man puts his hand on a woman’s ass, he should fully expect to be slapped. And if a man grabs another man’s ass, he should fully expect to have several of his teeth in his pocket while giving a statement to the police. Make sense? It does? Okay, take it away, Blake:

“Hey y’all allow me to seriously apologize for the misunderstanding with the whole re-write on the Shania song last night,” he Tweeted Thursday morning. “It honestly wasn’t even meant that way… I now know that their are people out there waiting to jump at everything I say on here or anywhere.” “But when it comes to gay/lesbian rights or just feelings… I love everybody. So go look for a real villain and leave me out of it!!!”

Man, then if the tweet wasn’t Blake’s inner homophobic thoughts of hate and anger spilling out then what was it? Oh, turns out it SOMETHING ELSE COMPLETELY.

“Blake is so not a homophobe. He really meant that from the perspective on Shania – it was just meant to be a jibe about someone grabbing her *ss. He feels awful.” Shelton Tweeted the controversial statement after watching Twain’s appearance on The Oprah Show where she opened up about her now ex-husband cheating on her with her best friend.

So, as usual, gays get all sanctimonious and start throwing around demands when they jump to conclusions and deem something they read to be offensive. If they put as much effort into taking things at face value and forming logical, rational arguments as they do with memorizing ABBA lyrics and accessorizing, the average American might not have an issue with gay marriage. Get the fuck over yourselves. If you replace any reference to LBGT with abortion and this letter and it sounds like it came from a conservative megachurch in Alabama with a picture of Jesus holding a dove painted on the side. Instead of stalking someone’s Twitter waiting to be offended so you can write a letter, how about taking a Zoloft with your Cosmopolitan and relax. Nobody gives a shit.