John Travolta Is Still Gay
Wow, I had no idea. Thanks Examiner.
According to [The Enquirer’s] recent story, Travolta is just a big ol’ bear with a mad lust for dudes. According to professional Hollywood gay-outing fun ruiner Robert Randolph, who is conveniently publishing a book on the subject, “I have no doubt that John Travolta is a sex addict. I’ve heard from many men who have either had gay sex with John or saw him having gay sex in health spas, steam rooms, locker rooms, you name it.”… Randolph says he anticipates at least fifty men to step forward, and those are only the ones willing to say they banged Travolta.
It’s no secret that John Travolta has been giving garglejobs since the days of Danny Zuko, so I’m kinda wondering what all the fuss is about now. Rumor has it that his wife Kelly Preston, who is very pregnant with their third turkey-baster baby, is also gay and that it’s a marriage of convenience. Snore! This is all old news. The Enquirer should stick to stories about Barbara Walters’ love affair with a martian and Nostradamus’ NFL predictions, and leave the big boy stories to real journalists. You know, like Perez.