Alanis Morissette Is Pregnant

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A song from her first CD made one of my ex-girlfriends realize she should break up with me, but more to the point, some white rapper I’ve never heard of didn’t pull out of Alanis Morissette. Us Magazine reports:

The singer, 36, announces the happy news in the new Us Weekly, on newsstands now. In Us’ “25 Things You Don’t Know About Me” section, Morissette lists “I am pregnant!” as No. 25. Morissette wed rapper Souleye, 30 (real name: Mario Treadway), this past May 22 at their Los Angeles home.”We’re very excited to embark on this journey with each other,” she wrote on her Twitter page at the time.

Whatever. Rachel Dratch and Amber are pregnant, too. If you really want to impress me, go squat by a tree and bite down on a stick in nine months.

Her kid might grow up to be the greatest white rapper of all time (here’s his mom signing the most depressing song of all time):