Brittany Murphy Is Still Dead

The biggest mystery of our generation is solved. TMZ reports:

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ the issue of mold in the house came up early during the investigation into Brittany’s death — but it was deemed “not to be a contributing factor.” Then when Simon passed away a few months later, we’re told the issue came up again — but Brittany’s mom, Sharon, wouldn’t let the L.A. County Coroner’s Office in to investigate the mold. Now, we’re told, Sharon has agreed to let Public Health investigators into the home. Mold could be relevant to Simon and Brittany’s respiratory health. Pneumonia was a cause of death for both of them.

Yeahhh, I’m gonna go ahead and call bullshit. Brittany Murphy and her chubby hubby were both found with enough prescription pills to have made Michael Jackson blush- you know, if it weren’t for that pesky vitiligo. Also, Brittany’s mother, Sharon Murphy, lived, and still lives, in that house and is pneumonia-free, and most importantly, death-free. Here’s a list of things I believe more:

1) Lindsay Lohan deserves to be let out of jail.

2) Santa Claus

3) the Holocaust was fake

4) John Travolta is hetero

5) Scientology is a legitimate religion

But yeah, sure, it was mold that killed them.