Lesbians Ruin Everything

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It’s hard to believe that Rachel Maddow is a lesbian since she deep throats Keith Olbermann’s dick every night, but unfortunately, she is. Which today I realized that kinda sucks, because here is her senior picture from when she attended Castro Valley High School. Here is her picture now. My friend Elizabeth told me that there is a prenatal steroid called dexamethasone that keeps female children from becoming lesbians and “uppity”. I’m not saying that the government should pass these out like Tic-Tacs, and although that’s a lie, the steroid at least may keep women from looking like they drive a scooter to go fist the incoming freshman to a Sarah McLachlan mixtape in the Women’s Studies building.

Note: When I say “lesbians”, I’m not using it as a blanket term to generalize all lesbians. The ones on college night and Cinemax can stay.