Tiger Liked Having Ambien Sex

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Rachel Uchitel (banner picture), the first woman to come forward as one of Tiger’s mistresses (she’s a 34-year who has served as VIP Manager for several clubs in NYC and has a history of banging married celebrities after she lost her fiance in 9/11), isn’t done telling everything she possibly can about her affair with Tiger Woods. Specifically, Tiger likes to get high before sex.Radar Online reports:

Now we’ve learned that Uchitel told friends that she and Tiger liked to have sex while taking the drug Ambien. Uchitel told one pal, ‘You know you have crazier sex on Ambien – you get into that Ambien haze. We have crazy Ambien sex.'” Ambien is a sedative used for short-term treatment of insomnia. Many people claim it enhances sexual experience dramatically immediately after ingesting it. Uchitel told several friends that she and Tiger had Ambien sex. She at first vehemently denied an affair with Tiger when the National Enquirer broke the story. After Tiger’s wild ride early-morning crash, Uchitel continued to deny the story and then decided to tell the truth.

I really need to talk to my lawyer about this, because I thought giving girls things to make them sleep before having sex with them was against the law. Say want you want about me jumping from behind a car and forcing Megan Fox to inhale chloroform, but this is basically the same thing right? The prosecutor in my case throws around words like “assault”, but I’d like to think it was a surprise party of Megan’s vagina.