Shut Up Matt Damon

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I’m waiting for today to be less boring and I really want to like Matt Damon, but apparently little miss Tuesday is being difficult. Us Magazine reports:

Damon — whose latest Untitled Jason Bourne Project is now in production for a 2010 release — also spoke out about how his famous assassin character is nothing like James Bond. “They could never make a James Bond movie like any of the Bourne films,” Damon said. “Because Bond is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women and swilling martinis and killing people. He’s repulsive.

Wow, seriously? For real? I might be mistaken, but I’ve seen all the Bourne movies and I don’t recall any scenes where Jason Bourne was working for Meals on Wheels or teaching a black orphan boy how to fly a kite. I mostly remember him snapping foreigner’s necks. Bond kills people and bangs hot spy ass because it’s his job, but I guess Bourne does it because he’s a victim and doesn’t know why God made him like this. Who knows if this age old argument will ever be settled, but I know what we can all agree on my friends. A regular towel doesn’t even work wet, but the ShamWow! works wet or dry! You’ll be saying wow every time!