What makes the pig nosed waif look like this – besides the obvious leather coating and hatred of food? I think she pokes a hole in her thumb and sucks it until she’s properly deflated. Her nipples are shaped like bicycle tire valve stems, so it’s easy to picture how she pumps those ridiculous looking breasts up to the desired size before heading out on the town with her much prettier husband. Posh Spice is so scary looking, I heard flowers literally die when she looks at them. Also, I heard every human who has spontaneously combusted had a picture of Victoria Beckham somewhere near them. So be careful, my friends.
Labels: david beckham, victoria beckham, victoria beckham breasts
posh-becks
Lil Dynamites
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Li'l Bionic Kids by Agnes Garbowska
Better! Stronger! Faster! …and smaller? Steve Austin and Jaime Sommers are the newest students at A.S.I. - the Academy of Science Intelligence, a school for the unique and gifted. They're also both cyborgs, human kids with a variety of high-tech body parts and modifications. Can these two outsiders put aside their shyness and growing rivalry in time to take a stand against alien invaders who are determined to ruin the A.S.I. Track and Field Day? In-stores January 15, 2014.
Writer Brandon Jerwa says, "I've been writing comics for eleven years, and doing something for an all-ages audience has been a goal of mine since Day One. As soon as I saw Li'l Bionic Kids on the list of potential projects, I knew exactly what my pitch would be. I would love to see this 'little' experiment win over a whole new audience of young readers."
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Li'l Battlestar Galactica By Agnes Garbowska
Li'l Battlestar Galactica, written by Eisner Award Winners Art Baltazar and Franco, featuring interior artwork by Art Baltazar
The search for Earth continues in this awesome epic event of tiny proportions! Who are the Cylons? Are they friends or foes? Does complaining to daddy Adama help or make things worse? Fear not, Apollo and Starbuck are here to save the day! Find out the answers to questions you've always wanted answered: How old do you have to be to ride a Colonial Viper? Is there a height requirement? What does Baltar have to say in all of this? And where do Baby Cylons come from? Come join the new and smaller adventures aboard the Battlestar Galactica! In-stores January 1, 2014.
Writer Franco says, "Dynamite - it's explosive! Being able to work on a property like Battlestar Galactica is so awesome. It's so much fun to be able to introduce a whole new generation of fans to characters we know so well... and Cylons! Who doesn't love them? Well, everyone, but yes... we've got Cylons!"
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Li'l Ernie By Agnes Garbowska
Li'l Ernie, written by and featuring interior artwork by Eisner Award Winner Roger Langridge
Ernest Fairchild is the most evil kid on the block. Why, he never eats his vegetables, his library books are sometimes three weeks late, and he once xeroxed his own butt! Can Mister Smiley, his annoying yet strangely ineffectual conscience, make him change his ways? And are Daddy Fairchild's blank eyes somehow related to his peculiar odor, rotting flesh, and appetite for human brains? Get a copy for yourself and one for the kids... it's wall-to-wall zombie fun for all the family! In-stores January 22, 2014.
Writer Roger Langridge says, "It's great to see Dynamite making an effort to expand its audience with a roster of kids' comics. I'm delighted to be involved with any effort to reach younger readers - and, of course, I'm using my command of the craft and my sense of humor to try to appeal to older readers at the same time. Like all my kids' comics, Li'l Ernie is written with one big kid in mind as its ideal audience: myself."
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Li'l Sonja By Agnes Garbowska
Li'l Sonja, written by Jim Zub, featuring interior artwork by Joel Carroll
Li'l Sonja is a warrior girl who travels the lands testing her mettle against monsters big and small, a younger and pluckier version of the famous She-Devil with a Sword. When Li'l Sonja encounters a town plagued by eccentric bandits, she needs to figure out the pattern behind the thefts and bring the baddies to justice. No task is too tough for our crimson-haired tyke! In-stores January 29, 2014.
Writer Jim Zub says, "Sword-and-sorcery storytelling is in my blood, and I'm excited to create a younger incarnation of fantasy's best-known warrior woman. Over the past eight years, Dynamite has done a wonderful job at broadening the reach and scope of Red Sonja. Li'l Sonja is set to inspire younger readers just as much as the original has bonded with an adult audience."
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Li'l Vampi By Agnes Garbowska
Li'l Vampi, written by Eric Trautmann, featuring interior artwork by Agnes Garbowska
Welcome to Stoker, Maine, the most normal, boring town in the world... or is it? There are sea serpents roaming the docks, a mummy in the town hall, and a gaggle of ghouls and goblins just devoured the breakfast cereal aisle at the local Shop-O-Mart! What is behind this monstrous rampage, and can it be stopped? When there are spooks afoot and arcane mysteries to be solved, it's time for Vampirella, teen scourge of the supernatural, to crack the case! In-stores January 8, 2014.
Writer Eric Trautmann says, "There's a real shortage of genuinely all-ages comics, something fun for adults as well as kids. So, when I was asked to cook up an all-ages Vampirella story, I jumped at the chance. I tend to work in darker territory in a lot of my work, so the opportunity to just cut loose and do some character-driven, humorous material is something I've wanted to do for a long time."
