Mischa Barton is Furious

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Mischa Barton has reportedly broken up with Cisco Adler, her boyfriend since 2005, because of, well, utter embarrassment. US Weekly reports:

A source tells Us Weekly the pair parted ways after nude photos of Adler, 28, surfaced on the Web. This NSFW pic of Adler hanging loose, which turned up among Paris Hilton’s possessions when the contents of the heiress’ unpaid storage locker were posted online at parisexposed.com (the site was later shut down). Says a source, “They had a blowup. She was furious.”

I don’t like penis or balls, but if I did, I’m almost positive I wouldn’t like this (NSFW). Because if I was a girl, besides carrying the most adorable Fendi bag and wearing lavender-scented thongs (settle down, boys!), I would wear my hair really long. And it would suck if my boyfriend’s nutsack was longer than my hair. And it would be even more terrifying if the whole world knew about it. Mischa could bleed all over herself again, and it would only be the second most embarrassing thing that happened to her this week.

Well, there’s this too:

Update: Eagle eyed drug addict reader, Susannah, asked us to zoom in on that suspicious white stuff on that table Cisco has his foot on, so we did. Here’s a closer look at it. And there’s Susannah snorting her computer screen. – Jenny