Joe Francis Gets All The Ladies

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Alleged rapist and overall douchebag Joe Francis, creator of the Girls Gone Wild franchise, called into the Howard Stern Show Wednesday morning to brag about his pending lawsuit against the people behind amongst other things.

Joe Francis called in to Howard this morning to “discuss” his and Paris’s pending lawsuit against While he claims he and Paris are not behind the leak, he mentioned the website name numerous times, and Robin and Howard didn’t buy it for a minute. Joe sounded extremely drugged up, or hungover, or still drunk?? But then again it was around 8 a.m. Howard time, 5 a.m. Hollywood time…Howard got him to admit that Paris was the best blowjob he’d ever received. When asked who gave the better bj, Paris or Lindsey, Joe responded, “Paris,” even though a few statements earlier he claimed, “Lindsey and I are just friends.” When asked who was the worst in bed of all the famous chicks he’s slept with (insinuated in this interview: Paris, Lindsey, Kimbo Stewart, Tara Reid) he said Tara was the worst, and when Howard asked why, he went silent again. When asked to explain why he claimed Tara was so bad, he wouldn’t come out and say it, but merely mumbled, “…well I only used protection with her, so maybe that made it less pleasurable…” Howard then began asking more leading questions like, “So she just laid there?” or “Was it because she had a big smelly loose vagina?” Joe responded, “More or less, yeah.” To conclude such highbrow topics, Joe stated, “Well I don’t plan on having sex with Paris again, especially after seeing the medical documents on the site.”

Holy shit, there’s no telling what this guy’s penis looks like now. It probably has tentacles and eats cats. When he goes to the hospital, the doctor has to stand behind lead and wear those glasses that generals wear during atomic bomb tests in the desert. I wouldn’t admit having sex with these skanks if I was kneeling in front of a Iraqi flag and wearing a blindfold.

Warning: Most of these are NSFW

Tara Reid:

Kimberly Stewart:

Lindsay Lohan:

Paris Hilton: