Paris and Jenna Might Have Sex With You

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Producers are holding open auditions for males between the ages of 18 and 34 to participate in a new reality show called Virgin Territory where the winner will lose his virginity. The winner’s possible prize? Jenna Jameson or Paris Hilton.

Hilton and Jameson have been contacted about “participating” in a reality show currently in production called “Virgin Territory,” in which a group of the uninitiated will find their way to the promised land. Ironically, it’s being brought to TV by the purveyor of Paris’ sex tape, Kevin Blatt, who predicts that even more people will watch “Territory” than “One Night in Paris,” Hilton’s infamous night-visioned romp.”

Not to nitpick here, but don’t you technically have to touch a vagina to be considered “not a virgin?” Paris and Jenna are so bored out, the six condoms the guy would have to wear wouldn’t even help him hit a wall. He might as well have sex with a manhole. You should really start thinking about moving out of your grandparents’ basement and cancelling your World of Warcraft party if you ever find yourself entering a contest where Paris Hilton’s vagina is the prize.

Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz at the AVN awards earlier this month: