Paris Hilton and Travis Barker Broke Up

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Paris Hilton and Travis Barker have reportedly broken up after Paris was allegedly “assaulted” by Barker’s estranged wife, Shanna Moakler. The October 3rd incident resulted in both Hilton and Moakler filing police reports. A friend says:

Paris realized this was not what she needed in her life right now.”

This person must not be a really good friend, because this is exactly what Paris needed. Actually, there should be a law that says whenever Paris Hilton wakes up, somebody should punch her in the jaw. Or hit her with a mace. I’m really cool with just about anything that causes bodily injury to Paris Hilton. If the courts would be so kind, I’d be more than happy to do my civic duty and tell this skank good morning every day.