Mel Gibson is a Great Parent

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According to Malibu residents, Mel Gibson and his wife, Robyn, supposedly let their seven children roam Malibu unsupervised where they “terrorize” the neighborhood.

One local tells us that Gibson’s kids, a daughter, 26, and six sons ranging in age from 7 to 24, “are the holy terrors of Malibu. They do whatever they want.” According to one story repeated by neighbors, Gibson’s high-school sons tried to buy two kayaks from a surf shop and demanded the store put them on credit. When told the family didn’t have an account there, a source says, “They got very angry and started shouting, ‘Don’t you know who we are?'” (Staffers at Zuma Jay’s and the Malibu Surf Shack, the two kayak stores in Malibu, say they don’t recall such an incident.) Malibu resident Shari Nassimi also finds the Gibson spawn wayward, but in an unspecified way. In a letter to the editor of Surf Rider News, Nassimi writes, “If Mr. Gibson would only pay attention to his own family and children, [who] have had issues of their own . . . he would [stop] perpetuating what he points to in others as evil.”

Throwing a hissy fit because you can’t get something for free and driving around Malibu burning crosses in Jewish plastic surgeon’s yards is the difference between “spoiled kids” and “terrorists.” So, excuse me Malibu. Excuse me if I don’t join your community watch program because seven white kids with manicures and trust funds parked one of their Mercedes S550s on your grass.

Mel Gibson is in hiding, so here is some pictures of the half Jewish and all hot Rachel Bilson and all Jewish Zach Braff at the Listening Party For Paramount’s “The Last Kiss”: