British Man Called Police Because KFC Was Closed And He Had To Go To Burger King

Photo: PeopleImages (Getty)

Yeah, even if your Groupon is expiring in 20 minutes, this is not an emergency.

According to Metro, some bloke in Manchester who must have been jonesing for a nasty case of the runs decided to make his way to KFC last week, but when he discovered it was closed because of a chicken shortage, he begrudgingly settled for whatever they have on the menu at Burger King these days.

In fact, the dude was so butthurt about KFC being closed that he called the 999 emergency number to tell them about it.

“I don’t know how you feel about this, but KFC is closed and I’m entirely not happy,” the moron said. “I have to go to Burger King now.”

Just how did the 999 operator feel about it? Well, pretty much as you would have expected, except she used several phrases that had us running to Google to find out what in the hell she was trying to say.

“Right, and you are taking the mick, aren’t you, ringing 999 for this?” the operator said. “You don’t speak to the police about it fullstop.”

For the record, when you’re “taking the mick,” it means that you’re joking, and when you say “full stop” or “fullstop” in England, you mean “period.” But you don’t need to know either of those two things to know that calling 999 because KFC is closed is just a dick move fullstop.

Well, at least KFC did this: Guy Who Discovered KFC’s ’11 Herbs And Spices’ Joke On Twitter Is Handsomely Rewarded