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We have just emerged from the sludge and filfth of the Internet with the best photos you will see today. Enjoy the fruits of our labor.

You can have a lot of fun in the City of Angels, some of it as pure as viewing late-night TV tapings, some of it not so pure, like cruising for trannies on Sunset. Use our helpful graphic to find out where you fall in the LA Matrix.

YouTube isn't just for videos. In fact, most of the fun takes place in the comments section. We collected more of our favorite comments.

There's nothing worse than being out at a crowded and loud drinking establishment and not being able to communicate with your friends. Modern Drunkard Magazine has the solution to your problems with their handy bar signs. Find out the best way to ask for more drinks without having to say a word.

These are some fantastic artist's renderings of what it would be like if everything in life was opposite. From roasting marshmellows to feeding pigeons, you'll see things could be very different.

Good news, bad news: weed smoking linked to testicular cancer, but the risk can be reduced by snorting coke. ... If you can't commit to owning a gun but you still want to fire off a few rounds, just rent a machine gun instead. ... We all look for celebrity skin online from time to time. Just don't go Googling Emma Watson. She will destroy your hard drive. ... If you have a daughter, you may as well just give up now because there are pole-dancing classes for girls as young as 5 years old. ... Regular cigarettes are bad enough for your health, but black-market cigarettes are filled with human excrement.

Lee has been called the Asian Kim Kardashian, but she's already acomplished more in her career than Mrs. Kanye West ever will. In 2011, Lee was voted FHM's Sexiest Woman in the World, and she's appeared in multiple movies, including "The Hangover Part II." See more of this lovely lady.

Elisabetta Canalis looks good in anything, but she really looks good in leather. ... You know "The Expendables 2" as a movie full of raggedy old action stars, but Nikolette Noel also appears in the film, and she's decidedly more pleasant to look at. ... When we stumble upon a gallery called "Girls Without Pants," we share the wealth.