A Gallery of Completely Crazy Cars

"Dude, can we take my car? I'm allergic."

"My car is not a girl car!"

"I just got tired of his whole needing-a-ride-to-day-care bull, you know? I'm trying to do Facebook over here!"

"I told you Clifford was not neutered."

"I got sick of people tailgating me all the time."

"I know there aren't any seat belts, and they will probably get melanoma up there, blah, blah, blah. I just hate the sound of my kids' voices."

"Drive faster! Mario is right behind us and Bowser has a red shell."

"I'm just trying to stand out. Sure, a Maserati would've been cheaper, but this is just me."

In the original script of "Dumb and Dumber" Harry and Lloyd were actually cat groomers.

"You know those stores at the beach with just a bunch of random stuff that no one ever needs? Well, I was parked outside one of them, and it exploded."

"I have an underbite and I was finally just like, 'Own it!'"

"I keep getting pulled over! You know what I bet it is? The whole red-car thing. People who drive red cars get pulled over a lot more, I guess. I heard that in drivers ed. That's gotta be it."

"You know how we are always like, 'You know what we need right now? A gothic gazebo.' Problem solved!"

"Where we're going, we don't need roads. Actually, that's because they don't have fuel for this thing yet. You gotta drive."

Dave just wanted his pasengers to know where his priorities were.

We know this isn't exactly a "car," but we need this burgermobile.

"I don't car if you are embarrassed by my car or not; I'm ordering lunch. Now do you want tater-tots or not?"

"Remember when that beach store blew up in front of my car last summer? You will not believe what happened yesterday."

"I'm not compensating for anything."

"This is made out of 75 cars. Go ahead: check the Car Fax."

"I want something that just screams, 'I'm awesome at "Mario Cart."' I think this achieves that."

"I could afford only half of Speed Racer's car."

"Happy Sweet 16! What? You hate it?"

"Just in case that whole Mayan Calander thing is for real..."

"I will never get sideswiped again."

"All right, you can have the car for your date tonight, but you have to mow the hood first."

In memorium of the beloved family gold fish. R.I.P. Goldy. June 17, 2012–June 20, 2012

"I'm not paying for a U-Haul. It's like 20 minutes away."

"Soccer practice is in five minutes. Let's do this."

"They see me rollin'. They hatin'."

"You've been playing 'World of Warcraft' way too long."

We have no idea what is happening here, but apparently the passengers are in distress.

This appeared in Quasimodo's 1857 episode of "MTV Cribs: Cathedral Edition."

"I could've bought an entire new car or these sick rocket boosters. I made the right call."

"Yes, I'm working on saving up for the front tires."

"I don't care how much it cost you, Frank. It's no excuse to park like an asshole!"

"Does it come with a car phone?"

Poor bastard. Now he has zero trunk space. Where are the groceries going to go?

"And we are off on the futuristic tour of the apartment complex that you already live in."

"I'm looking for something practical. Something that can accommodate a large family." 

"On the bus! Behind the yellow line! I'll run over your parents, you little snots! Try me!"

"Confession time. We did have a little collagen done. You probably can't even tell. We have a guy; I'll give you his card."

"Sir, as miraculous and coincidental as this is, I would still appreciate it very much if you pulled over so that we could exchange our information."

This car was a gift for Jonah after the whole swallowed-by-a-whale thing. He and God had a good laugh about it later.

"I like it, but it catches fire very easily."

"You know how no one ever has a pen when they get into an accident? That's never a problem for me. In fact, I hit people on purpose."

"I think my wife is going to love it. I mean, I'm not going to say no to a convertable that's three grand."

"I just circle parking lots until I find the perfect spot, then I strike!"

"Quick! To the Sarah-Palinmobile!"

You thought you had a good sound system.

"I won't lie to you; it's a bitch to parallel park."

"I asked for a mid-size. Friggin' Hertz."

"Normally when I see one of those, I hit someone on the arm. But now I don't know what to do."